Sunday, February 26, 2012

It's Just One of Them Days...

After a long Saturday spent grocery shopping and keeping the hub company on the job (when it should have been his day off), my brain just felt drained from thinking way too much about this move to Texas....
Knowing my hub has been stressed lately with work and school has partially affected me to a point where I've been considering moving back to Cali to pick up from where I left off so that he can eventually follow in the later months. However, the fact that I am his wife and serve as a pillar when he's down and out, I just can't take that easy way out and leave. It's like giving up and not  being strong enough to face the challenges of this experience. It's a tough road when you're far from all that you love especially when it comes to family and friends. Believe me, when I see family pictures that my relatives post on facebook from gatherings, it does make me feel sad that I'm not there to be part of it all, but I don't dwell on it to a point where it'll eat me up inside. I just think of this all as a temporary situation.

Yesterday, after a few text exchanges with my dear cousin J and reading that they were out celebrating my Grandfather and Mom's birthday at the Pechanga Resort, I started to feel the way my hub has been feeling since the day we arrived here. I began to miss home like crazy. It wasn't until later in the evening that my hub reassured me and reminded me that he loved me and didn't want me to think he didn't want me here. First of all, I really wouldn't have thought to move back if it wasn't for him as I know one thing for a fact is that he misses Cali so much that he would be willing to take his old position back. Then again he'd mentioned that he would deal with things here if we're able to adopt an adult, small to medium sized dog from a foster care since he's been missing our pup back home. Unfortunately, we had decided to leave our beloved pet back at my in-laws as we just don't have the space for a large dog and I would hate to take him away from where he's at because he has everything there that any pet would be lucky to have. As his wife, I'm open and willing to do what it takes to make it all work out so that we both can be happy. After getting all worked up yesterday, I was willing to do just about anything to make him feel better about being here. Then I realized that all he really needs is a hug and reassurance that things will eventually get better, that's all. Perhaps I've been a little hard on myself during those moments when he needed me the most by thinking too much instead of acting on it with affection and words of reassurance. The fact that we don't have all the things here around us that we would normally turn to on our down and out days has been pretty challenging for both of us TRUST, however so far we've been managing through it all and I've been keeping on by remaining strong. 

As we both continue to work and remain positive through it all while often reminding each other that things will work out for the better, all we know at this point is that this situation is only temporary. So on this lazy Sunday after a nice warm shower and a clear mind, I remain at peace playing Smooth Jazz On Demand with my hair up and full bottom sitting indian style. I'm looking forward to the hub coming home after his 7th long day on the job then eating some Corner Bakery food as its been a while since we've had any soup and sandwiches. Just a little something to make us feel warm and fuzzy inside...As Monica would say, "it's just one of them days...".


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